My dream job, part one

I left my last job simply because my leg was starting to bother me when I schlepped up three flights of stairs to get to the stacks. I interviewed at the new college library that will remain nameless in 2000, before I was outwardly showing symptoms of MS. I knew it was there waiting but no one else could see it. I was snatched up for the job of Periodicals Librarian.

I went on vacation before starting and when I returned, I was advised that the current Library Director had given her two week notice. For some unknown reason, she chose to tell one of the remaining staff people how much money I was being paid. Because my starting wage was higher than what she was being paid after eight years, she quit in protest. The end result was I was starting a job, did not know any of the responsibilities and had one part-time clerical worker to show me the ropes. Right off the bat, I was working 10 hour days to help with the staffing problems. To try and resolve some of these problems, the administration brought back a previous employee. Then they had the brilliant idea that the two of us would compete to be the new library director.

Unfortunately, the returning employee had psychological problems and the competition to be the director set her off. She started disappearing for 30 day periods, spending time in the local psychiatric hospital. I was stuck working 10 hour days again to cover. This went on for over six months until she stole money from our little petty cash fund and chose to quit. I guess it is obvious who won the competition to be director.

I was asymptomatic for the first three years but then started to have pains in my right leg and had to use a cane. I had to reveal why this was happening. This information was then passed on to the personnel officer. There were no negative initial repercussions. After a few years, the disease progressed and I added to move on to a walker. At this point, I was warned to try not to show any additional outward signs of disability. I was told that someone in the administration was not in favor of a visibly disabled person working in a public service position. I wasn't quite sure how to take this advice and how not to be visibly disabled but I wanted to keep this job because I knew at this point I could not easily get another. Who would hire anyone who had an obvious chronic progressive disease? Meanwhile, as my disease became more obvious, I noticed all the job descriptions for the other local libraries suddenly had physical requirements in the job descriptions… Now a library director was required to climb ladders and lift 25 pounds. Clearly, surrounding libraries did not want a disabled library director either. I had to hold onto this job as long as I could.

Keeping the caution in mind, although my disease progressed, I continued to use the walker and did not move on to more appropriate assistive devices probably longer than was safe. I finally switched to a scooter without any fanfare and tried to stay under the radar. At the same time, I will say very modestly that I was an excellent director and performed beyond expectations according to my personnel reviews. I received several awards, expanded student usage of the library, served on several vital college committees and initiated many programs while keeping the library running under budget. There were no complaints about me.